Friday, 16 April 2010

The Debate

Tim from Bristol: If you were to come into power, how would your party change a broken light bulb?

Nick: We'd ensure that the people have the power to replace light bulbs when they break and also see to it that replacement light bulbs are much more energy-efficient and long-lasting.

Gordon: While we could replace a light bulb, the reality is that no light bulb is broken. Light bulbs today are also the brightest and most efficient than they've ever been.

David: Thank you for asking this vital question. A lady wrote to me last week telling me how every light bulb she has in her house has broken over the past 12 years of Labour government. Every single one. Only the Conservatives can bring real change to British light bulbs.

Gordon: The only reason the Tories would bring in new light bulbs would be to make David's face look even shinier. The fact is, new light bulbs would only hinder Britain's economic recovery and that is something Labour is unwilling to let happen. How would the Conservatives finance this exactly?

David: Recent studies have shown that it's not the broken light bulbs that need changing. The real issue is, why do we even need light bulbs in the first place? I'll tell you why. It's because Britain is dark and it's only getting darker. Not a day goes by where it doesn't become so dark that it doesn't become inevitable that at some point you will have to rely on a light bulb to even walk around your own home. Why has Labour allowed this continue for so long and why are they so in denial about it?

Gordon: We are not in denial, we just have the experience and the wisdom to realise that we are not alone in this problem. The rest of Europe knows, even America knows, that darkness is a global problem that affects everyone. However, this is not a problem that will just go away overnight. We all need to work together, both across our parties and with the wider world community to overcome darkness in a way that is fairer to everyone.

Nick: You know, the more you two talk, the more apparent it becomes that neither of you have a real understanding of this at all. Broken light bulbs just need replacing with new ones. It's as simple as that

David: And where would you find the capital for these 'simple' plans to change light bulbs? You can't talk of slashing £16bn of expenses and then say that you'll do it by giving everyone free light bulbs for life. The numbers just don't add up.

Gordon: I'm sure Nick will agree with me here, what Britain's light bulb infrastructure is solid, long-term investment in ensuring that Britain is prepared for when light bulbs break. We need continuous investment in Education, the NHS and the armed forces so that we able to prevent light bulbs from breaking. This is what Labour has done and is what it will continue to do. The Conservatives can talk all they want about change, but when it comes down to it the only people to benefit from their plans is the top 5% earners. This is why Labour has made a personal promise to every citizen that when their light bulbs break we will guarantee them access to an electrician within 2 weeks, and a light bulb changing operation within 3 weeks. David can't make that promise, and Nick can't make that promise.

Nick: What? Tim, going back to your question; broken light bulbs can be replaced with a new one. There is no need for any extra bureaucracy or politics.

Gordon: I agree with Nick.

David: I'm sorry Gordon but I just can't agree with you on that. I agree with Nick and look forward to working with him in the future.

---Saoirse Cathal Kavan

Saturday, 3 April 2010

Internet Picture Saturday

I don't remember the last post at all, although I certainly could have done another one the other night. That was some good drinkin'

Anyway, it's that time of the week.

Sunday, 28 March 2010

The Drunken Sunday Update

Wooooooooooooooooo, drinking!]]

OKay, so, I am drunk. But that fioeesn't mean I ahve serious opinions ions on things

;.;./;/,ml kplmgasesterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

okay, look, the point is, that, at this moment in time, I am tremendously happy with life.###

Deal with it, bitches.

Tuesday, 23 March 2010

God Bless Disney

Okay, so I've made the point before that my job is pretty sweet. However, I think I've found an even better job.

To make sure LA talent scouts don't get caught in a "booby trap," potential lassies will have to undergo a Hollywood-style jiggle-your-jugs test and jog for judges. If there's nothing moving from the waist up, they're saying, it's a dead giveaway that you're not all flesh and bones -- and you're out

Phenomenal. How tricky would it be to fly out to California and apply for this?

Monday, 22 March 2010

I do like it when I get to use this tag

So, Americans finally voted to get themselves some of this evil socialised medicine that we've been enjoying in the civilised world for some time now.

I don't really want to spend a lot of time picking apart the nuances and effects of the bill (it's a big step in the right direction, but not as earth shattering as it could be) and I also don't want to pick apart the Republicans (even though they acted like massive tools throughout the entire process, and continually showed why American politics is far more about posturing and appearances than it is about helping the people. (I mean, that's true for almost all politics really. (Wow, that's an awful lot of brackets. Let's close a few of these.)))

Instead, what I wanted to do was link to this thread on Free Republic to point out the hilarity within. I mean, it's certainly wrong that I get so much enjoyment from this, but when dudes start quoting from Episode III:
So this is how liberty dies......with thunderous applause.
as a way to express their anger, I can't help but be highly entertained.

Also, I'm really glad that I don't have so many friends on Facebook that are American. I imagine that a few status updates have been painful to witness.