Day Fifty Six: SPECIAL SUNDAY UPDATE OF DRUNKENESS

So, it appears a certain Mr Turner has taken on himself to dare criticize the shining beacon of perfection that is this blog.

Well, that's fine. After all, I welcome attacks on my opinions. Because my opinions are unique in that they are always, 100% correct. This is true. Because I said so. And, as we've discussed, I am always, always right.

James claims somehow that The Cable Guy is a bad film. He puts forward the idea that it is boring and "Jim Carey[sic] suck arse in it." Now, as much as I enjoy intelligent film criticism, I have to say that this really excels. I mean, it takes a true talent to say that a film is boring without ever being entirely clear on why. Especially given that the films tone of unsettling terror is happily counterbalanced by an action scene every twenty minutes, and dialogue that is truly inspired and perfectly satirical for the time.

Now, actual criticisms I could understand. The direction is sloppy, which is understandable given that it is Stiller's first film, but it's still a point to be made. Furthermore, we never really connect with out protagonist at work, and it's only outside that we are given the opportunity to engage with him. These are proper, intelligent criticisms.

But for James to simply dismiss it as boring?

Well.

I'm not going to say that he's fucking retarded for making this assumption. I'm not going to say that he is crappy and uninspired in making a blog, purely to attempt to compete with the sheer awesome that is this one. And I'm not going to say that he's a total loser for not going out tonight and instead staying in and writing on his blog.

I won't say any of those things, because I'm a lovely person. I'll simply say that the half-arsed, rambling post above is something that I managed in about ten minutes, and that James has no good taste in films. Any films that he might like in common with me are clearly products of his deluded mind.

Also, I'm kind of drunk and kind of angry. Not at James, but some other things. So.

Hopefully you'll now all understand that James is painfully wrong, and The Cable Guy is fucking awesome.

Goodnight.

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Now playing: Orson / No Tomorrow